I wanted to recapture some moments from a concert I had on February 26th. It was the Trabuco Hills Vocal Department's POPS concert, where instead of performing traditional choral pieces, we performed musical theater songs, pop songs, rock songs, and some other songs of a variety of genres. It was rad to try something new with the folks I adore.
I was in a number of acts, but I want to focus on two songs in particular. (but uh- out of order...)
THHS's Chamber Choir finished the concert with a song called "You Will Be Found" from the absolutely astounding musical "Dear Evan Hansen." This is a song that Ben Platt, Laura Dreyfuss, and the rest of the ensemble sing together as they're spreading awareness for a character named Connor Murphy (Mike Faist)'s suicide. It's a very emotional and moving song that makes for such a climax in the musical, but was such a climax in our concert as well. Let me try to explain this best I can for those who weren't there:
A little less than half of Chamber Choir walked out onstage wearing street clothes (THAT'S RIGHT FOLKS, NOT CONCERT ATTIRE!!! sorry for screaming, i just got a little excited about this aspect...) and we spread out around the stage as introverts. Then, the soloists sang their solos and as the rest of the choir walked in to greet us as extroverts. From there we walked back into a single U-shaped line around the stage. We sang together until we left the U-shape and walked into lines. As we walked we were speaking our letters to our own fictional "Connor Murphy"s which was really powerful. And then we sang in lines until we moved into a V-shaped formation this time and then walked back to the lines from there.
I don't know if that physical perspective helped (to be honest- you probably skipped over it, and that's cool because I probably would have too), but here's the emotional perspective because that's what made this song my favorite number to be in.
Backstage, we all were huddled close together. I looked over at my pal Alyssa and asked her to tell me things that were going to make me cry. I wanted to be prepared to have the ability to control my tears onstage, so she reminded me of all of these emotional moments from the place where my love for this song began. OCSA. She painted this scene in my head of me saying goodbye to my friends on my last day of school. Of me crying because I didn't know if and when I was going to come and visit. Of me hugging my best friends one last time because I wasn't sure if I was ever going to see them again. And then she said that in this hypothetical situation, I wasn't able to contact any of them via technology. Imagining this situation was really upsetting because the only contact I have with anyone from OCSA is online right now. So when I walked onstage, I wanted to cry even more than I had before we had walked onstage.
Soooooooooooo fAsT-FoRwArD: I'm onstage now and the music has just started and there are tears in my eyes. We were told that our characters were high-anxiety introverts (which was so funny because that was so accurate) and I didn't even have to try. I was already there. Additionally, I had the second solo which was "Have you ever felt like you could disappear? Like you could fall and no one would hear." This solo is a real tear-jerker for me because we've all been there. And Alyssa's hypothetical story had me there. So then at the next solo, when the rest of our pals came to meet us onstage, Hannah (my other super rad friend) walked out and gave me a massive hug before we walked to the next formation. And this hug, although apart of the choreography, was so real because I whispered in her ear, "I'm about to cry," and she whispered back, "Me too."
Onstage, as we all sang in the U-shape, I was able to look around at all of these people who are my new family. The people who are going to be there for me for the next two and a half years. The people who had my back. The people who supported me. The people who laughed with me. The people who cried with me. The people who sang with me. My new family. And I felt my eyes well up with tears.
Throughout the rest of the performance, I was trying so hard not to break down and cry. It just became so emotional for me. This was the song I sang with my best friend Paige Frank day after day at my old school. The musical that brought me closer to my pals in conservatory. The production that we sang along to every day when we did warm ups in Mr. Casey Garritano's class. The show that's brought me so much joy. And I got the opportunity to sing it with my old family every day at school and now my new family at my new school. It was so amazing.
I could go on and talk about this number for ages, but I'll move on for your sake (and mine). The other song that I wanted to talk about was my solo. I sang an original called "10:45." This was incredibly special for me because I hadn't performed it before for really- anyone (except for two of my friends and my teacher when I had auditioned), so it was a new experience for me.
Adding to my lists of new experiences, when I performed, it was just the piano and I onstage. The only time that I've ever performed with just a piano was when I did piano recitals growing up. This was the first time I had sung and played by myself in front of an audience. It was also the first time that I've ever been the one to control the silence after a piece finishes. Let me explain. When a song finishes, there is this moment of silence after the piano pedal gets lifted. I was able to do that. I achieved the silence. And unless you've experienced that, or something similar, it's kind of hard to explain the emotions I felt (this feeling was the exact reason why I created my "1,000 Words" page) so I guess the photos attached will have to suffice.
Anywho, I just wanted to post this to recapture this concert and to explain to those who missed it how powerful music is and how rad my choir is (and also how emotional I am... LOL). But really, it's moments like these where I'm just so stunned by the power of music and the capabilities it possess. It brought everyone together that night. The music that was created was felt in the theater. And it was stunning.
With that, another blog another day!
*Just for you Olivia! ;)
Much Love,
Delaney Miller