In all honesty, I wanna talk about myself today. I've been exhausted lately. & The more I realize it, 2019-2021 so far has really put me through the wringer. I'm constantly reminded that my life never stops and in so many ways, it feels like I'm living in a movie, but not in a good way. I mean, I have a few moments that make me feel like a main character, but I also feel like a manic pixie dream girl trope and I hate that. It's not the dream, it's exhausting. I feel like I only exist sometimes to teach and learn lessons by loving others until circumstances change. That's so tiring. Anywhoo, that's a fun lil' self-revelation I had this week.
Speaking of last week, last Friday I took a little tumble passed out in my kitchen, which lead to a brief lil' ambulance ride to the hospital. Good stuff. (Don't worry pals, I'm home healing and I'm gonna be just fine!!!) I'm feeling significantly better today than I have the rest of the week, but oh my gosh, like I said, it never stops. I've got two weeks of homework to do now because I've got a concussion and can't be reading or online for too long. I've got some TikToks I wanna make for networking purposes, I need to clean my room, I have to clean my bathroom, I've gotta get back into the swing of things, I need to heal properly, but time doesn't slow down. We're closing the second trimester of the Bible Study group I lead this week, I need to mail a package to my friend in Canada, I've gotta finish getting all my paperwork sent to my school in New York, and more. Yet, I have no motivation to do anything. & it's been A YEAR since COVID kinda shut everything down. Like, BROADWAY SHUT DOWN A YEAR AGO TODAY. (That's when I knew it was gonna be bad.) I just can't handle it all, ya know? & I wish this could be a blog post where I gave advice and gave you all the answers, but I don't have them. I've got nothing. I just wanted to talk about how I'm doing.
Recently, I've updated my Spotify, so I've made some pretty catchy playlists with really good transitions. That's made me happy. I miss my friends a lot. They're good people. I've got pretty good pals right now. I'm really lucky for that. The Rooted group I'm co-facilitating is almost over in a few weeks and that's crazy. Our family's Christmas Tree is still up and fully decorated which might be my favorite thing going on right now. I really wanna go hammocking soon, I miss the way the sun feels when it hits my cheeks. But those are the good things. OH and my favorite uncle (and now my new favorite aunt too!!!) literally just WALKED THROUGH MY FRONT DOOR YESTERDAY COMPLETELY UNANNOUNCED and they're staying in California for the weekend super close to my parents house! So I'm super stoked to spend time with them and MY NEW BABY COUSIN AGH! (He's absolutely precious. I do not have baby fever, I do not really see myself having kids anytime in the near or far future, but I love this lil' babe.) So yes. There are some good things keeping me around and happy. What else have I done lately? (This is an absolute ADHD post, if I've ever seen one, so none of this is in order or truly coherent.) I visited a monastery last month with my best friend Isabella and that was super exciting. We also went paddleboarding last month which was super fun too! (ISABELLA IF YOU'RE READING THIS LET'S MOVE IN TOGETHER HEHEHEHE) OH! And I helped my super smart friend Julie with a research project she's working on! (Julie if you're seeing this you're literally the smartest person I know oh my goodness you blow my mind!) So basically I've had some pretty good adventures lately which have been refreshing.
I don't know, I've been feeling extra introspective lately, so that's been cool. Not sure if I'm ready to share all of those findings here on the internet right this second, but like I said last time, I'm just tryna be more honest and casual in documenting what I'm up to, what I'm doing, and all that good stuff. It doesn't always have to be some big hyped up work of writing. It can be a lil' morning journal like this one!
Much Love you guys,
Del Marie
P.S. I'm having issues with my photos on here right now? Like, my blog has removed half of my photos? & I'm not sure why. So I'm figuring that one out friends. It's gonna be okay soon, I'll fix it when I find the time.
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